Here are some of the general pieces of advice I have for myself and some of the folks I care about for 2026. I will be following these closely.

Make an effort to forgive, for your own sake, without forgetting, also for your own sake. Forgiving lets you release the emotional grip of some transgression made against you. Don’t forget, though, what was done. Know what to expect based on your previous experiences and take steps to protect yourself from harm, but recognise and accept that not everyone is perfect and that others’ imperfection may reach you just as your imperfection may reach others; if it is not your fault that you have been transgressed against, it is not on you to adopt extra emotional labour over the transgression.

If you have done the transgression, apologize honestly without resorting to lofty therapy-speak as a codified crutch; address the core of the fuckup and be real about it. Additionally, if you do find that interpersonal issues can be worked through and you are willing to work through them, then work through them. You can initiate conversations about that stuff yourself without waiting for someone else to handle it for you.

If someone has transgressed against you years ago and since changed their attitude and ways, try giving them a second chance. I know I am not the same person I was three years ago, so why should I inherently expect anyone else to be?

Communicate ideas and feelings clearly and make sure you are understood. Even though language is inherently imprecise, do this as precisely as you can. Many things should be said rather than kept secret or implied; people often get things wrong when they are made to read between the lines. Keep things factual and respond thoughtfully; don’t react with hostility. Be honest and open, as long as it is not meant to hurt. Additionally, minimize your association with the snide and the sociopathic. Notice how people talk about others behind their backs versus to their face. Speak out about dangerous people.

A house is a safe area for the people who live there. When in someone else’s house, always obey their house rules, unless the rules themselves or the effects of following them are intended to debase or hurt you. Additionally, be careful not to mistake personal disagreement over someone’s house rules as a sign they have disrespected you. If you cannot agree to their house rules, you can leave their house. On top of all this, exercise at least some level of self-awareness over your own effect on the safety of others when you are a guest somewhere. The “house” here applies to homes, group chats, parties, etc.

On top of this, and in synergy with it: as an antidote to systemic shaming from a conservative status quo, we need to embrace cringe. At the forefront of my mind is an idea that fostering acceptance of so-called “radical” social ideas and refusal to slot into repressive ideological norms will disarm those who use shame to quell social progress. We shouldn’t let fear of pushback keep us down; after all, it is difficult to control a people through social coercion when the people simply choose to reject the coercion and express themselves regardless. If our fear is killed, the coercion dies with it. If some tradition or custom is causing us pain, we simply need not participate. Anything that goes against the safety of us queer folk should be trodden upon.

In cases where disappointment or disgust is used against us, we must acknowledge and accept that it is happening without allowing it to stifle or overwhelm us. All the same, if we come to find that our ideas are criticised in ways which are productive and have potential to bring about an improvement, we should accept the usefulness of the criticism. In the face of shaming, however, we must continue to opine regardless. Always seek to express yourself as honestly as you can, no matter the reaction you fear, but be willing to have an open mind outwardly as well. In contexts where lives are not put in danger, there is no alternative other than keeping ideas to yourself, which will lead to the death of those ideas before they are made known, thus tightening the social pressure’s grip over you.

Furries using antifascist symbology or language should make a concerted effort to actually decouple themselves from the institutions, businesses, and even personal practices which are antithetical or hostile to that antifascist messaging. It defeats the messaging to resign to helplessness here, even if you believe you are "just one person." A revolutionary force is comprised of many individuals. We cannot choose to use exploitative companies like Amazon out of convenience or learned helplessness and justify it with ideas of futility. Reject the convenience these companies have sold to you previously, be careful of their influence over you in the future, and don’t yield to the detractors who claim it is too hard or “too weird” to do this sort of corporate decoupling; anything you truly need can be found elsewhere.

As for clothing, a functionally (and often fashionably) superior version of an $80 article of new clothing may be found used for much, much less. As for food delivery, minimize your reliance on it; consider it a treat for special occasions. Instead of spending 45 minutes gaming on a computer while waiting for a $35 food order to arrive at your door, shop for groceries one time in the week and then make the food yourself as needed in those 45 minutes or less. Buy generic brands, use coupons, and take advantage of sales. Plan out your time as you must so you don’t have to resort to eating drive-thru slop. Reject Temu-type fast fashion. Get a grip on reckless consumption.